Snow A'comin'

According to the weather report, we're gonna be on the northern edge of a major snowstorm. Aunt Becky is on the southern edge, where it'll probably be an ice storm, and Grandma Arline is in the middle. Supposed to start precipitating here Saturday morning, with anywhere from 1 to 5 inches by Sunday morning. Time to go get the fixin's for some of my classic beef stew. I been tryin' to eat right. Oatmeal with raisins for breakfast, with an occasional morning with pancakes, eggs, and bacon. Burger King or Wendys -- only one or the other -- only one day a week, not five anymore. No more Cokes or even Sprites... I gave up Dr. Pepper months ago, to no effect. Water only. Lunch is limited to peanut butter and jelly, or tuna salad, deli roast beef, or today, egg salad sandwich, with a half-cup of mixed nuts and some Fritos corn chips. No more afternoon snacks. Dinner is one helping of meat, one or two helpings of vegetables, and a (big) potato or (big) helping of rice. No dessert normally. I've had only one batch of popcorn in the last week, two batches in the last three weeks. No bedtime snack normally, but once or twice in the last two weeks, I've had a couple of graham crackers with peanut butter. A cup of green tea or chamomile at bedtime to get to sleep (it really does help, I'm really amazed at how well it works and how good I'm sleeping). And finally, a multivitamin, a calcium tablet, a vitamin D3 megadose, and now, some kinda B-vitamin Dubby wants me to take. Okay, I've deviated from the above a couple of times (a dinner buffet with Dubby, a pizza one night, and two nights that I had helping of key-lime pie on graham crackers), but nothing like what I used to do. I've been on this regimen for about four or five weeks now (essentially the entire month of January). The result: I'm feeling about the same, but I'm sleeping a whole lot better, ... oh, and I've gained four pounds and my pants are significantly tighter and my shirt collars are tighter. Go figure. I'll give it a couple more weeks, and then it'll be back to skipping breakfast six days a week, Burger King for lunch three days a week and Wendy's two, back to the Cokes, Dr. Peppers, and IBC Creme Soda's, popcorn with 1/2 cup of butter every night of the week, seconds and third helping at dinner, corn dogs as snacks, and at least one meat-lovers pizza every week with two or three of the garlic butter dipping sauce packs. As Will Rogers said, "if at first you don't succeed, try try again. Then quit, 'cause there's no sense in bein' a damn fool about it."